Saliha - My daughter-in-law, my daughter.
(An enviable and exemplary autobiography of a religious scholar's home)
I told Saliha on the very first day that you should live here not as a daughter-in-law, but as a daughter. My two daughters passed away soon after birth. Allah Almighty has given me their replacement in your form. I also told my wife not to treat Saliha like a daughter-in-law, but to give her daughterly love. Thank God, Saliha has adjusted to my house as if she were really our daughter.
Saliha is the daughter of my cousin, Maulana Akhlaq Ahmad Nadvi. She received her education at Jamia-tul-Mominat, a girls' school in Lucknow. She took her high school, intermediate, and BA exams privately. When I intended to marry my son, my choice fell on her, and the marriage took place very simply.
In our area, dowry is exchanged on a large scale, but I strictly forbade it. Therefore, Saliha brought nothing from her parents' home, but I provided her with everything she needed, such as a double bed, mattresses, quilts, a wardrobe, a dressing table, etc. I also provided her with a mobile phone so that she could talk to whomever she wanted freely.
Saliha didn't know how to cook properly. I said, "It doesn't matter, she will learn as she cooks." In the beginning, the rotis were crooked, sometimes they would burn, sometimes the salt in the curry would be bland or too strong. I always praised her and ate the food happily. Gradually, she has now become very good at cooking. She didn't know how to sew. In a few months, she learned good sewing.
Saliha takes full care of the comfort of both me and my wife. When I come back after offering Fajr prayers in the morning, I find tea ready. The times for lunch and dinner are fixed, and there is no delay in serving the food on the table at that time. We all eat together. When I reach the bed at night, I see that Saliha has opened and spread the quilt. My wife uses a hot bag, and she finds it ready on the bed. Saliha takes full care of her comfort and serves her in the same way as a daughter serves her mother.
One day I saw tears in Saliha's eyes. I couldn't bear it. I said to my wife, "Tears in a girl's eyes in her in-laws' house mean that her relations with her in-laws are not good. What's the matter?" My wife explained that nothing had happened, she was just missing her home. I decided that she should be sent home for two weeks.
I also carefully observe how Saliha's relationship is with her husband. I keep urging my son to take care of Saliha and not say anything to her that might hurt her.
In Islamic Sharia, it is not the responsibility of a girl to serve the other members of her in-laws' family besides her husband, but this is a legal matter. If a girl receives love in her in-laws' house, she will not hesitate to serve with love and affection. I am surprised at those who complain about their daughters-in-law. They should treat them like daughters and see, they will find their attitude changed..!!
(Muhammad Razi-ul-Islam Nadvi)